Conflicts, Guilt and Trap of the Situations

 Self Esteem is

Something super important in life or we are going to lose the essence and essence is the basic or most important quality. Peace lies inside but we always try to find it outside. In money, prestige, honor and in many worldly things. Actually we don't know what does it mean by peace. 

Expectations are something which are mainly responsible for the grief. So does it mean that we should leave expecting? Nope, life will stop running without expectations. Then what and it's also the major attack on our false self that we expect something from others and it doesn't fulfil. Means Self is also made up for some expectations. Self esteem is a different thing. Lets find the difference by this example, let's assume we are at a railway station where some one comes and ask for some food or money, whatever. Then we just watch at him and turn our face in different direction. The person who was expecting from you is going to ask for another time and then he will leave and go for another one. He is not going to feel any disgust or anything like anger. That is because he has no self. But he may have the self esteem. Because self esteem doesn't stops you to beg, it's your 'self' which stops you to beg. Buddhist monks live on alms, it doesn't mean that they don't have self esteem. They have super self esteem but they don't have one thing that is the self. Many of the times conditions trap you in a way that you have to secure yourself by showing aggression or oppose. I'm not saying we should start begging but we should start differentiating between the ego and the self esteem. Ego is the false value of self where you expect the value in others eyes but self esteem is the value in our own eyes and ultimately in others eyes. Because they are no different from you. As we are trying to find the definitions of conflict and their reason so the definition of conflict in my way is that when situations start attacking you try to torn you. The main reason behind this your comfort zone. The people who live in super comfort are going to define every little situation as conflict. Where the people who face little super discomfort are going to neglect little conflicts. So this all is about your comfort zone. When the area increases the joy decreases. 

Guilt is something we find when there is a gap, the gap between your actual and ideal self. The gap between actual and ought self is the failure.  So the point is this gap. Only solution to guilt and the failure is to diminish this gap. This gap can only be reduced by efforts and efforts should be in perfect direction, to find this perfect dimension there is again need of efforts. This is the thing where situations traps you and now you need better understanding for right direction to choose. Because understanding is the only way to choose better direction. 

Better understanding needs your better watchfulness and watchfulness is something which gets strength by meditation. Finally the point comes to the meditation. Here watchfulness not only meant for outwards but also for inwards. Hence to understand this trap, to diminish that gap, and to find that direction to work for; the Way is sharpen the seeking and seeking can be sharpened by Dhyana.

I know I've not completely explained about the title I've mentioned still, try to get the essence be happy Keep learning.